April Fall

It struck me how far apart we are now.. how our lives have lost almost all connections, but how just seeing your face takes me memories back. Your face is still the same, perhaps older, decidedly wiser, and etched with a certain sadness I didn't quite notice at first and I can't quite name. I wonder what your thoughts are like now. I used to ask you insensible questions about it and you'd laugh. That was so long ago, wasn't it? I have not even remembered until I stared at your face again. Your certain sadness is spreading on to me like the fall of dusk on a street--too slow to notice, but before one knows it, it's already dark. The sadness envelopes me as I scan your face. The old lines are there, more new ones too, and yet I cannot quite ignore how familiar the curve of your mouth looks, or how I used to love the way your face crinkles when you smile. I do not love you anymore. That came to me in an immediate flash. But HOW I loved you. That came in heavy, bearing implications I cannot afford. Not anymore.