Regrets

There will be times in our lives when promises are given more freely, and believing them is easier.  When we feel invincible and timeless and unconquerable.  When it's easier to allow ourselves to feel and the thoughts in our heads may be as confusing, but not as cluttered or easily forgotten.  When the little joys are more important than the end goals.  When love is the only important thing in the world.

Savor that time.  It too...passes.

Wrinkle in Time

It is discomforting...
to know
that nothing
quite inspires me
the way you do.
And that
no one
can impressively
break my heart
the way
you can.

September

I am miserable, can you tell?

Sometimes I lie awake staring at nothing, feeling nothing. And it’s the saddest feeling in the world. Sometimes I feel like glass, fragile, translucent, close to a breaking point that I cannot quite understand. I tell myself silly stories. I dream them. And when I wake up, the stark reality of what I see fazes me. I do not know what I am built for. I used to think I am made of sterner stuff. After everything, I thought I must be one tough person to be able to have withstood a shattering. But maybe, just maybe, the shattering hasn’t really stopped.

I Had A Dream

We've moved on, haven't we? I hear the echoes in your silence. And the pictures I see tell me the stories I do not need to tell. I am reminded of long conversations and flashes of moments quite faded into memories. I remember now, slow as a trickle, how I have taken for granted so many of the things that should have meant so much. But because it has been so long, and we have moved so far, there is only a distant ringing. And of course, the single sigh. You have awakened in me so many facets of my being. I did not know how to be myself then, but I do now. It would perhaps have made a lot of difference had I known then, but I doubt the journey would have been the same. You are a lucid memory. Always will be.

Getaway

If I close my eyes right now, I can almost smell the sea and feel the heat of the sun burning into me. I hear the waves crashing as it lulls and disturbs my peace at the same time. I know you are there. The beach will always bring me to you. Your bronzed skin and easy smile urges me to close my eyes and savor moments. I hear music in the background. Your songs. They are so much a part of me now. I can always tell which playlist they belong to. Haha. I open my eyes a little and see your hand near mine. Our ring on your finger. I want a getaway. When can you take me there?

Hands

Your hands. I love looking at your hands. Both graceful and so strong. They move with a deliberate ease that is sexy and relaxing at the same time. I could spend hours just watching you at work. And when you're done, you look at me, and take my hand into yours, and the warmth in them seeps into my bones and my world tilts on the side of happy. I love your hands. They take me into dreams and right beside you.

Life

Excited
to feel you move
to watch my belly ripple like waves as you roll over
nothing will ever come close to this feeling
no words
can describe
it's just you and me
and will be until you greet the world with your eyes
I can't wait to take your little hand
and hold it in mine
and tell you that everything will be alright
that nothing is perfect
but you and I are real
you and I
are one.